Home > Archive > Cobol > April 2005 > OT: Only slightly OT - Microsoft and the New Pope
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OT: Only slightly OT - Microsoft and the New Pope
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| SkippyPB 2005-04-17, 3:55 pm |
| VATICAN CITY - In a joint press conference in St. Peter's Square this
morning, Microsoft Corp. and the Vatican announced that the Redmond
software giant will acquire the Roman Catholic Church in exchange for
an unspecified number of shares of Microsoft common stock. If the deal
goes through, it will be the first time a computer software company
has acquired a major world religion.
With the acquisition, the new Pope will become the senior vice
president of the combined company's new Religious Software
Division, while Microsoft senior vice presidents will be invested in
the College of Cardinals, said Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates.
"We expect a lot of growth in the religious market in the next five to
10 years," said Gates. "The combined resources of
Microsoft and the Catholic Church will allow us to make religion
easier and more fun for a broader range of people."
Gates described Microsoft's long-term strategy to develop a scalable
religious architecture that will support all religions
through emulation. A single core religion will be offered with a
choice of interfaces according to the religion desired - "One
religion, a couple of different implementations," said Gates. The
Microsoft move could spark a wave of mergers and acquisitions,
as other churches scramble to strengthen their positions in the
increasingly competitive religious market.
In a related announcement, Microsoft unveiled it's new Internet
Explorer slogan, ""One World, One Web, One Program."
Cheers,
////
(o o)
-oOO--(_)--OOo-
"When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that
someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?"
--Robin Williams
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Remove nospam to email me.
Steve
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| Donald Tees 2005-04-17, 3:55 pm |
| SkippyPB wrote:
> VATICAN CITY - In a joint press conference in St. Peter's Square this
> morning, Microsoft Corp. and the Vatican announced that the Redmond
> software giant will acquire the Roman Catholic Church in exchange for
> an unspecified number of shares of Microsoft common stock. If the deal
> goes through, it will be the first time a computer software company
> has acquired a major world religion.
>
> With the acquisition, the new Pope will become the senior vice
> president of the combined company's new Religious Software
> Division, while Microsoft senior vice presidents will be invested in
> the College of Cardinals, said Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates.
>
> "We expect a lot of growth in the religious market in the next five to
> 10 years," said Gates. "The combined resources of
> Microsoft and the Catholic Church will allow us to make religion
> easier and more fun for a broader range of people."
>
> Gates described Microsoft's long-term strategy to develop a scalable
> religious architecture that will support all religions
> through emulation. A single core religion will be offered with a
> choice of interfaces according to the religion desired - "One
> religion, a couple of different implementations," said Gates. The
> Microsoft move could spark a wave of mergers and acquisitions,
> as other churches scramble to strengthen their positions in the
> increasingly competitive religious market.
>
> In a related announcement, Microsoft unveiled it's new Internet
> Explorer slogan, ""One World, One Web, One Program."
>
> Cheers,
>
> ////
> (o o)
> -oOO--(_)--OOo-
>
>
> "When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that
I also saw that MS is going to publish a new encyclopedia. The
justification given was that existing encyclopedias cannot be changed
fast enough.
I suspect the two are related.
Donald
;< )
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